I have a theory (I'm kidding. I have a thousand. Here's one). In and amidst our achievements and adventures, we live our fundamental day again and again. Between the highlights and the crises, we have heavily developed patterns and rhythms we barely notice as we live them.
These days are either slowly building up our sense of well-being, or slowly, ever so slowly eroding it.
The good news is, a small fix daily is 365 small doses of goodness a year. One small change feeds you again and again and again.
The bad news? Those rough interactions with your loved ones, that defeatist self talk swirling in your mind, the numbing behaviors sneaking in (scrolling, scrolling, scrolling), all chip away at your foundation of well-being. We can fix this- I promise, we can. When I pause long enough to really consider the effects of daily feelings, emotions, interactions, and work- it is always, always worth the time and effort to improve them.
I call our standard day with the kids a Building Block Day. It's a normal, no fuss, pack lunches/school/homework/reading/dinner/baths/bed kind of day. Mine is currently the life of a SAHM with some freelance work and exactly as much laundry as you'd assume a family this size creates.
The tone of this day- this familiar, comforting, occasionally boring day is a barometer of childhood. If this day is pleasant, childhood will be pleasant. If this day is stressful, negative, or contentious.... that's the general tone the kids will remember.
Yours may be commuting, going to work, and having dinner with your spouse. It may include no spouse or children, but more community, work, or volunteer efforts. It may be full of small children or teenagers or texts with college kids. Whatever it is, my encouragement is to pay attention to yourself and the people around you, figure out where the rubs are, and come up with some ideas to smooth those rough spots out.
So here we are. The day. How does it feel when waking up and get ready for the day? How does it go picking out clothes? What little conversations are happening? Out loud conversations with loved ones. Conversations we all have with ourselves. (Man I really need to touch up the paint on these cabinets. Does anyone need PE clothes today? I should track my eating if I'm going to hit those fitness goals I set for myself). Getting kids ready for school- what is my responsibility? What is theirs? Where are the shoes? Does everyone know what they need that day?
Packing your bag. Breakfast- do you cook? Grab a bar? Subsist on coffee until lunch? Commute time. Shower. Homework. What's for dinner? Picking up ,dishes and laundry. These things never stop or slow.
This day is full of little treats and stresses that we experience over and over (and over and over). We have it roughly 5 days a week, sometimes more or less depending on the season of life. For an incredible number of issues, I think the answer is- fix the building block day, fix your life. If life is stressful getting out the door most mornings, let's fix that. Let's really break down the morning and figure out those little pains and stresses. No time for breakfast? Nothing to wear? Does your room feel cluttered? Do you know what you need for the day? Phone charged? Waking up exhausted?
Let's talk about the little wins and little losses that fill our normal day- how to make small changes that end up changing our years together.
These days are either slowly building up our sense of well-being, or slowly, ever so slowly eroding it.
The good news is, a small fix daily is 365 small doses of goodness a year. One small change feeds you again and again and again.
The bad news? Those rough interactions with your loved ones, that defeatist self talk swirling in your mind, the numbing behaviors sneaking in (scrolling, scrolling, scrolling), all chip away at your foundation of well-being. We can fix this- I promise, we can. When I pause long enough to really consider the effects of daily feelings, emotions, interactions, and work- it is always, always worth the time and effort to improve them.
I call our standard day with the kids a Building Block Day. It's a normal, no fuss, pack lunches/school/homework/reading/dinner/baths/bed kind of day. Mine is currently the life of a SAHM with some freelance work and exactly as much laundry as you'd assume a family this size creates.
The tone of this day- this familiar, comforting, occasionally boring day is a barometer of childhood. If this day is pleasant, childhood will be pleasant. If this day is stressful, negative, or contentious.... that's the general tone the kids will remember.
Yours may be commuting, going to work, and having dinner with your spouse. It may include no spouse or children, but more community, work, or volunteer efforts. It may be full of small children or teenagers or texts with college kids. Whatever it is, my encouragement is to pay attention to yourself and the people around you, figure out where the rubs are, and come up with some ideas to smooth those rough spots out.
So here we are. The day. How does it feel when waking up and get ready for the day? How does it go picking out clothes? What little conversations are happening? Out loud conversations with loved ones. Conversations we all have with ourselves. (Man I really need to touch up the paint on these cabinets. Does anyone need PE clothes today? I should track my eating if I'm going to hit those fitness goals I set for myself). Getting kids ready for school- what is my responsibility? What is theirs? Where are the shoes? Does everyone know what they need that day?
Packing your bag. Breakfast- do you cook? Grab a bar? Subsist on coffee until lunch? Commute time. Shower. Homework. What's for dinner? Picking up ,dishes and laundry. These things never stop or slow.
This day is full of little treats and stresses that we experience over and over (and over and over). We have it roughly 5 days a week, sometimes more or less depending on the season of life. For an incredible number of issues, I think the answer is- fix the building block day, fix your life. If life is stressful getting out the door most mornings, let's fix that. Let's really break down the morning and figure out those little pains and stresses. No time for breakfast? Nothing to wear? Does your room feel cluttered? Do you know what you need for the day? Phone charged? Waking up exhausted?
Let's talk about the little wins and little losses that fill our normal day- how to make small changes that end up changing our years together.
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