Mid-Afternoon Rage and Letter Writing.

Did anyone write me a letter, asking if I am concerned about my parish, my diocese, my Church?

Did I receive articulate, heartfelt petitions asking me to stand up and take notice?  To rethink the plans and actions of my little flock?

I'm laughing... but it's not a funny laugh.  Of course no one did.

Nobody has to guess if I'm furious.  Anyone who knows me already knows I am down-deep-in-my-bones furious with a red heat crawling up my spine as I read and listen.  Why don't I know the same about my clergy?  If you need me to WRITE YOU A LETTER to tell you that abuse, intimidation, obfuscation, and lack of authentic moral life are not acceptable in my clergy- you're already fired.  If you don't know these things intrinsically, if you don't speak about them willingly without mothers and fathers begging you to take action- you're already fired.  If you're "shocked"- you're fired.  You knew, or you should have known.  It's your job to know.  It's your entire life's work to know.  If you need my humble suggestions for full,  independent investigations and moral and financial transparency, you're fired.

I'm writing my letters, but I'm baffled as to their purpose- who do we think is reading these?  Certainly not those to whom they are addressed.  I imagine this is much like a political office, where a staffer is sort of loosely categorizing messages so they can report 547 letters were received this week and they had strong themes of action and transparency.  WHY IN GOD'S NAME DO YOU NEED TO BE TOLD THESE THINGS?  How did my own Bishops monotone insert into the parish bulletin pass muster?  How did no one tell him it was completely inadequate?  No plan of action to ensure our priests are living the life they proclaim, no efforts to rebuild trust, no admissions of knowledge, no sackcloth, no ashes.  My priest did vaguely mention the news before mass with no more feeling than noting the upcoming pancake breakfast.  I sobbed silently.  My children patted me, confused.

 There is a staggering amount of inertia- priests and religious I've heard from shrug with their palms up and open, agreeing somberly that this is terrible indeed, if only they had the power to change anything.  What does it take to get some movement?  (If you go by articles being written it sounds like more letters).  

There are seasons of life that ask questions and seasons that give answers.  At this point, we have far more questions than answers.  I throw this on the pile of writings about our Church as a cathartic outlet, a clarifying focus to my rage and kindling on an already roaring bonfire.