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Showing posts from August, 2020

The Silent Permission

Sometimes, I think I need reminding more than I need teaching. Most of what I need, I already have... I just need it dusted off and set where I can see it. So here we go. If you can be brave with your story, when you are brave with your truth, you silently (and probably unintentionally) give others permission to do the same. When you tell the truth, when you unearth the parts you never thought you had the strength to say aloud, you give everyone who hears permission to do the same.  I've seen it happen again and again and again.  The moment you hear a chapter you recognize, your heart leaps- "I thought I was the only one!"  All of a sudden, you are not closed and alone, wondering why your life experienced such hardship or such confusion.  You are among your people- and they know how you feel. In the circle of friends, time can easily pass without anything of consequence being discussed (and that's fine- we all need some levity).  But here is the secret...

Borrowing

As a wife and mother, I've got some game- if you need someone to coordinate a holiday meal, conquer an impossible to-do list, blitz clean a house, or drill multiplication tables, I'm your girl (wow- fun).  I also have many, many gaps (home decor, rest, general fashion, managing expectations, shutting up).  You just can't be all things to all people in all situations- being a mother to many teaches you that early and often.  My go-to tactic when I know I'm in the weeds?  When I know one of my kids needs something from me that I just.... don't have?  Don't know how to do well?  Don't know how to give authentically?   I borrow.  I have family and friends with such incredible skill sets- when someone needs something from me that I just don't have to give, I borrow their skills.   I have a dear childhood friend who has always radiated confidence- I saw in her what has never come naturally to me.   Luckily for me, she wears he...